Whether you understand it or not, to your child, you are Superman. At least it starts off that way. When it comes to fathering there is nothing sadder than a Dad falling from grace. Being a Dad means managing a daily cluster of different hats – much like Superman. Your daily report card is visible to us all. The way your children behave is a direct reflection on you and your wife.

When children go out in public they behave the same way as in the home. They don’t know to act differently because to them it’s the same as being in the house.

You have a responsibility to your children to be understanding, spend time with them, build a relationship with them, and be one of the first mentors in their life. That is what it means to wear the cape – taking the enormous responsibility that has been entrusted in you and never letting your children down. Your children have high expectations and it is up to you not to disappoint them.

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Why?

Well, a big part is the opening lyric, “Look at the stars, Look how they shine for you, And everything you do…” In my opinion, some of the most poetic lyrics in music. I use to contemplate what these lyrics meant to me. Rarely, do I think about what the artists’ inspiration or mood was when writing anything. I know better. Rather, I take the responsibility of relating the music to my world, therefore, I’ll always remember a time in my life with vivid detail and also the music becomes part of me.    

“Yellow” fell upon my ears during a time when I was searching for my purpose in life. Please don’t confuse the word “purpose” for a higher purpose. I just wanted some kind of direction. I was lost. Because I wasn’t in a relationship at the time the memory is mine. I don’t have to share it with anyone else. 

I associate past relationships with popular songs of the day. Every relationship I had came with a theme song. I never told the person whom I was with about their “song,” but they have one. Even today when I hear “Satellite” by Dave Matthews Band it reminds of someone in particular. I only remember the good stuff when I hear it.

Recently, I associated “Yellow” with my present relationship. For some reason I can’t explain a song that was released nearly 10 years ago, a song that until recently belonged to me now belongs to someone else. I meditated on this current conundrum.

My rationalization came up with something I was either thinking or searching for, something I’ve seemingly found today. At first, I was skeptical regarding my theory. How could I find something with someone a decade later? A decade that encompassed me getting married, having two children, divorcing, changing careers three times and moving nearly a half dozen times?

It not only seems unlikely, but impossible. I couldn’t come up with anything else. It has to be it. As I write this post I can’t help but, smirk at the past decade – it was all worth it!

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Happy New Year

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I doubt any adult would look back on their youth and say, “I loved doing homework.” I never did. In fact, I would rush to get my homework completed before I even left class. If we were given a reading assignment, I would skip it; if we were assigned anything that didn’t require handing something in the next day, like staring a research project, I wouldn’t do it. I despised homework. I viewed homework as a violation of my civil liberties. When I’m home, I’m on my time. How dare a teacher expect me, to do work on my time? How arrogant can a person get?

I was an average student through grade twelve.

My daughter, on the other hand, loves homework. She can’t wait to get home, tell me about her day and complete her work.

We sit down at the table and begin immediately upon arriving home. I give her my unfading attention. The session only lasts forty-five or so minutes but, for me, it seems to last much longer. Observing her sounding out words while reading, or drawing little pictures to aid in subtraction problems, brings me unfathomable joy.  You can learn a lot by observing a child’s homework habits. For instance, how they work out a problem. My child will reason out loud as she is adding, subtracting or sounding out words. Another example would be how they handle momentary failure.

I quiz my daughter every night on her spelling words. She has a spelling test every Friday. When she doesn’t get a word correct, we do a retest on that particular word until she correctly spells it. In the beginning, she didn’t care for the retest. She actually hated it. Now, she laughs when spelling a word incorrectly and says, “I’m just being silly.” She usually spells the word correctly the second time.

I enjoy the way she handles adversity. I aspire to handle adversity as she does – nonchalantly. Witnessing my unassuming daughter handle difficulty with such affluence makes me smile. I can’t wait for homework nowadays; it inspires me to no end.

Have a great day and God Bless.

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When immediate family members live long distances away life continues; sometimes without giving them much thought. In our personal lives we dread over maintaining a long-distance relationship. People will comment long-distance attempts at love are impossible to maintain. The excuses are endless. Regarding family though, how could we so easily dismiss them because they live a considerable distance away? Going further, I know people with family members living within miles they only see a few times a year – if that. Life is too short to live alone. Our children need family to maintain a sense of history in our world.

A constant grandparent, aunt, uncle or cousin can make a tremendous difference in the life of a child. Adolescents crave to achieve a sense of belonging as they enter adulthood and extended family members can give that to them. As we venture out on our own we can do so, with comfort, knowing our immediate and extended family will always be there for us. A loving family will do all those things for our children.

As fall approaches and people tend to stay indoors try reaching out to all those family members you’ve always wanted to “catch-up” with; rejoice in conversations about your childhood and tell them how important they were in deciding the person you’ve become today. People come and go in our lives, but family is forever. Why not reach out and reconnect with them? A close family is invaluable – not just for our children – but to us as well.

Have a great day and God Bless.  

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For many of us the glorious NFL season begins today. I know Pittsburgh and Tennessee kicked off the season on Thursday, but really, who cares about either of those teams? The teams we all want to see are playing today – J. What makes for better football than great comfort food? Well, I have an easy enough recipe from one of my new favorite chef’s – Big Daddy Aaron McCargo, Jr.

Aaron won season four of the next food network star; the same show that produced Guy Fieri has to be able to find dynamic talent, and hands down Big Daddy can cook. Besides, Aaron McCargo grew up not too far from me in Camden, New Jersey; attended the same community college as I did, Atlantic Cape Community College; and he currently lives in Cherry Hill, New Jersey, only a few miles from where I live. In support of a local celebrity and fellow Dad I bring you one of his best – at least I think so – recipes on his menu, cheese stuffed bacon meatballs. I added the sub part.

Cheese Stuffed Bacon Meatball Subs

Ingredients

• 8 to 10 slices applewood smoked bacon
• 1 pound ground chuck
• 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
• 1 package onion soup mix (trust me, the onion soup mix makes for great flavor)
• 1/2 cup panko bread crumbs
• 1 tablespoon coarse black pepper
• 1 tablespoon beef stock
• 8 to 10 bocconcini mozzarella balls
• 1 loaf of Italian bread

Directions

• Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.
• Arrange the bacon slices on a sheet pan. Put in the oven and bake until crisp, about 8 to 10 minutes. Remove the bacon from the pan to a cutting board and chop. Set aside.
• In a large bowl, mix together the beef, Worcestershire, onion soup mix, bread crumbs, black pepper, stock and the chopped bacon.
• Form portions of the meat around bocconcini to make smooth balls. Arrange the meatballs on a sheet pan with a rack and bake until thoroughly browned, about 10 to 15 minutes.
  • Remove the meatballs from the pan and serve with marinara sauce on the Italian bread.
  • For a crispy sub-sandwich, reduce heat to 350 degrees F and bake the bread on a cookie sheet for approximately 5 to 10 minutes.

Helpful Tips:

• This recipe makes for 4 people and I double it. We have many big eaters around.
• Try not to handle the meat too much or the meatballs become sticky. If this has happened to you it’s because your body temperature is 98 degrees F and you actually start cooking the meatballs if you handle them too much – so don’t.
• Cooking time is 45 minutes; allow an additional 15 to 20 minutes for prep time.
• My mom makes her own marinara – or gravy if you’re from my area – I can’t give out her recipe, but if you want to make your own there are plenty of sites on-line with helpful tips and ideas.
• Follow the recipe, at least for the first time, so you can compare and contrast. The ingredients, in any recipe, are your keys to success. Whatever you do purchase the applewood smoked bacon; panko bread crumbs; 80%/20% ground chuck, it’s makes for better meatballs because the extra fat adds flavor and holds the meatballs together; and whatever you do, don’t substitute the bocconcini mozzarella balls. More than likely, any other mozzarella ball will seep out and, in my opinion, ruin your dish. Also, try to stay away from seasoned mozzarella balls they are usually dipped in oil, seasoned and you already have enough flavor in this dish. If you take your time and find the ingredient these meatballs are real crowd pleasers.
• It’s up to you if you want your bread crispy or soft. Is you choose for a softer sub, wrap in foil, being sure not to use too much sauce, or it will get too soggy, and bake for approximately 10 minutes.

God Bless and Bon Appétit!

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I make it a daily practice to bond with my children. Bonding with children is a very easy thing to do because they are so willing to join in on most any activity; as long as your intentions are genuine and sincere. Your intentions have to genuine and sincere or they’ll sniff you right out and become disengaged. Most people are capable of honest and sincere expressions so you’ll be just fine. I always approach them excited, you really have to be charged up, but “spooky clown” jacked up. Act excited and natural.

For example, when I try to get excited about introducing new food to my kids they immediately know I’m putting on a show; no matter how hard I try to mask my approach they still know. Kids are very in tune with their bulls**t radar.

I always pick an activity they’ll enjoy like when we are on vacation we’ll go swimming together and hiking and horseback riding; everything kids want and love to do. I get really excited about the excursions – most of the time I’m just as excited – and I let them have fun. I let them run around and burn off excess energy; I’ll run around with them most of the time. Kids are great when you let them be themselves and act like kids. Half of my vacation pictures are of my children and their goofy expressions. It’s great fun and make for incredible memories. Besides, when my kids get older and ask me why they made such silly faces; I get to tell them because you were having so much fun that was the expression you came up with at the time. You were being a kid and most importantly – you were being yourselves.

Best Wishes and God Bless.

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It’s that time of year again. We are starting a new tradition for the girls this year – we’re going camping. That’s right, we’re starting a new tradition before school starts and we’ll spend some time in the wilderness appreciating nature before starting a new year hitting the books; both for the girls and Dad, even though I already started school last week. Recession or no recession the trip has to be made. Giving all the chaos amid the hospitality business, finding deals on vacations are quite simple if you do a little digging and know where to look. I like to start in the condo world.

Timeshares and Condo rentals are the first segment to get hammered in a recession because of the perceived cost. We purchased a great deal on a 2-bedroom fully equipped condo in the Pocono Mountains for $139.00 per night for three nights and four days, including two horseback riding tickets. What a great deal as the entire package with tax only cost us $488.00. Not too bad because it’s close enough to drive there and we’ll pack food to cook in the fully equipped kitchen – saves a little extra money.

I have the whole trip planned out.  We’ll visit the Crayola Factory on the first day; then we’re going hiking at Bushkill Falls on day and visit the outlets for some shopping; and the last day is horseback riding and nature trail hiking at one of the many parks. I’m sure we’ll have a blast. The resort also has indoor heated swimming pools and a hotbox for Dad; I love to get a good sweat going at the end of the day to open up the pores. I’ll post some pictures and tell you all about it when we return on Thursday.

Have a great Labor Day. Best wishes and God Bless.

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After my long Eden Diet and Water Fast, life seems a little more precious and enjoyable. I have loads more energy and wake up early enough now to really get my day started with my kids. My new life finds me up at five in the morning. I write my posts every day, going back and forth between this site and my lifetips dad site; read a little or wrap up some work from the day before. A little quiet time to get my thoughts in order before starting the day – it’s nice to have that time. My real pleasure comes when my ladies wake up. I prepare all their meals and I love caring for them. I can say without a shred of doubt caring for my kids brings me more joy than anything I’ve ever done in my entire life. I enjoy it that much.

I pick up my youngest daughter every day and hold her like it’s my last day to enjoy the moment. Don’t ever take something like holding your child for granted – it would be fair to you or them. I cherish the moments.

My oldest daughter starts 1^st grade in a week and she is way too excited. I tried picking her up and throwing her in the air like when she was younger, but she’s too tall now. When I bend down to pick her up she’s just too tall. Just like that it’s over. Somehow it doesn’t seem fair. I feel a little cheated. She loved it when I tossed her about over and over. My youngest really doesn’t care for it – she never really did. It something Bella and I enjoyed together. Now she wants to print paper cards off the internet and glue them together to give to her mother. She’s so sweet.

I’m guessing this is how fathers become estranged with their daughters. As they grow older and their interests shift to more feminine endeavors we begin to pull away or they do, if Dad doesn’t show any real interest in their new interests. Well, I’m not going down THAT road. I’m moving on from throwing her about to Paper Mache – I have too. I don’t want to lose her.  

Where’s the scissors and glue? Daddy’s still here.

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Water is the essence of life. Although, getting our kids to eat and drink more water is easier said than done. We’ve found the best way is to incorporate foods that have high water content. Since I’ve been on my Eden diet a constant concern has been my children’s nutrition. I can easily make the right choices, but my children want to eat McDonalds, hot dogs and pasta. All of these foods have low water content. How can we achieve the near impossible?

Easy, we just tell them they have to eat the food we give them.

Sure they put up a fuss and we keep reiterating this all they are going to eat – no dessert. The first foods we tackled in getting them to eat and drink more water was their liquids. My children only drink apple juice and those V8 fusions drinks. A month ago we began diluting their juice more than usual. I never gave them 100% juice; I always cut it in half, half water and half juice. A month ago we began to add less and less juice.

They now drink 1/3 juice and 2/3 water. The improvements I’ve seen is more frequent bowel movements, looser stools, higher energy(I can’t say that was wanted), and most importantly improved sleeping pattern. Their foods took a little creativity. Since most vegetables are cooked and therefore are robbed of some of tier nutritional value as well as water content we decided to incorporate more fresh, raw vegetable and fruits. They are served a fresh salad everyday for dinner and occasionally for lunch.

We are slowly incorporating the lunch salad – I think they are onto me.

The salad is made with fresh spinach and no lettuce. Spinach has a high nutritional value and immensely heavy in antioxidants. I also add in shredded carrots, pickles (they love them) and a dressing. They are particularly fond of ranch dressing.  We also cut back on cookies, crackers and other crunchy snacks. If a food is crunchy it usually has extremely low water content. If they want a snack we usually give them some fresh fruit or yogurt. Try incorporating more water in your children’s diet and reap the benefits.

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